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 Good Afternoon, Fellow Americans, This is Paul Harvey

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FROM SANTA CLARA, FRESH FROM THEIR COUNTLESS DEMAND TO BAN HOME CANNING OF PEACH JAM, AN ANATHEMA TO LOYAL PAUL HARVEY FANS, THE HURLY TRIO OF JAIN,PARK< BECKER ARE DEMANDING ALL TAYLOR SWIFT FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS BE CONFISICATED BY LEVIS STADIUM STAFF



RINGLEADER OF THE HURLY TRIO, JAIN< MIFFED THAT TAYLOR SWIFT FANS ARE DEDICATED TO BINGE WATCHING MATTHEW MODINE FILMS, INSITS TAYLOR SWIFT FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS 
CARRY HIDDEN MESSAGES


JAIN IS CERTAIN TAYLOR SWIFT FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS ARE CARRYING UFO SIGNALS




AN ELECTED POLICE CHIEF IS JUST THE TYPE OF PUBLIC OFFICIAL, SUDS JAIN,  INSITS THAT ALIEN VISITORS SEEK

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